Pastor Janae’s Blog

Well it’s exactly one month until our wedding day! When I look back over the last 5 months since our engagement, I’m reminded how quickly time flies. Since the beginning of the engagement I said I would blog my insights, well I’m about 5 months behind…but here we go anyway!

Love Changes You

I realize that I am not the same woman that I was before I met my fiance. Truthfully, I’m not the same woman I was when we started dating at the top of 2009. Heck, I’m not the same woman he proposed to in April! I was a very assertive, confident, decisive, focused, and ambitious woman. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still all of those things; but I was also inflexible and impatient. (My mother would say that I’m still inflexible and impatient!) But my goodness, God has worked miracles in me. I am amazed how God is teaching me to hold my tongue, humble myself, and even deny myself!

I’ve discovered that while healthy relationships add tremendous value to a person’s life, they also demand work and attention. Everyday one must reevaluate motives, renegotiate outcomes, and reconsider philosophies and principles (to name a few) so that you take the very best of who you are into a relationship with someone who offers you the very best of who they are.

Question: Are you offering the very best of who you are to those you love and cherish?

In our lives of multi-tasking, overcommitting, and stretching thin, it is so very easy to give those we love and cherish what’s left over. I used to be that way. Then God placed me alongside a revelation of God’s divine love for me, alongside my “answered prayer request” and I discovered that leftovers are not appealing. Everyday I make a decision to be the best me that I can be, not because it will benefit me, but because the one I love deserves it.

Have you ever been in a situation where you stepped outside of yourself, looked at yourself and said, “Is that really me?” I feel like that everyday. I can’t believe that God has blessed me with this indescribable gift of love and commitment. When I’m honest with myself about my frailties, weaknesses, and faults, I’m amazed that God chose me for this blessing. If you’re single, you may be thinking, “C’mon, it can’t be that serious!” Trust me, it is! This was worth waiting for!

Blog with you soon!

Comments (3) Sep 18 2009

For the last few weeks, my Pastor has been preaching from the series “Say What You Need To Say”. It has been such an insightful and convicting sermon series. In a recent message “Speak the Truth in Love”, we are each challenged to dig deeper into what we say, how we say it, and why we say it. We have been reminded that our communications are directly related to our relationship with God. When we communicate scathing, thoughtless, and hurtful ideas and feelings without any regard to the big picture, the implications of the words, or our responsibility in the matter, we are actually conveying the level of our spiritual maturity!! A spiritually mature person is able to process, reinterpret, and package their ideas, emotions, and feelings, BEFORE expressing them. This is because a spiritually mature person does not disconnect their communications with others from their communication with God. Isn’t it unfortunate how we think we’re spiritually mature because we read our Bibles and go to church every Sunday? But we discover that our everyday lives are raggedy and we’re not as spiritually mature as we thought? I challenge you to process, reinterpret, and package your ideas, emotions, and feelings BEFORE expressing them. I challenge you to grow up a little bit more today!

Pastor Janae

Comments (0) Mar 25 2009

You know there are times when life deals us a bad hand. And it seems that the more we draw from the deck, we continue to feel like we’re losing the game. Some of us are born into well-to-do families, while others of us struggle our whole lives long. Regardless to the circumstances we are born into or find ourselves in, God is able to make treasures out of us. (Ephesians 3:20)

I recall hearing a story about a sheet of high end parchment paper that sat so exquisitely in the credenza of a rich artist. There was also a thin sheet of inexpensive paper thrown on the floor with boot marks, random scratches, and stains. The ruined paper snubbed at the elegant paper saying, “You have it so good. You don’t know what it feels like to be walked on, written on, and thrown away.”

The elegant paper said, “You don’t know where I come from. There was a time in my life when I was good for nothing except scratch paper. I was ripped apart, spit on, marked up, passed around, and then thrown away left alone on the street.”

The ruined paper responded, “I don’t believe it! You don’t look like any of that bad stuff happened to you!”

The elegant paper responded, “Well it did! I had become so accustomed to being in that condition, that I expected my life to be that way forever; until one day the unexpected happened. I was picked up by a complete stranger who took me to what’s called a recycling facility. I met other paper that had been treated the same as me. The stranger put all of us together, sent us through an uncomfortable, but quite beneficial process of breaking, purging, pressing, and refining. When it was all over, we all came out like this…elegant and exquisite. None of us are exactly sure why the stranger picked us, but we know if we had not been thrown away as trash, we would have never become treasures. Now I walk around with this stamp that says ‘Recycled Materials’. It’s proof that I wasn’t always what I appear to be right now.”

God has a recycling process for each of us. Just because we feel like trash, or have been used, abused, and left alone, there’s something better than what you see right now. (Mark 10:27) Set your eyes and your mind on what is possible and set your trust in the One who can make it happen. Read Philippians 4:8: “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-if anything is excellent or praiseworthy-think about such things.”

Perhaps the test of your faith and strength today is to live as treasure even when others treat you like trash!

Comments (0) Feb 04 2009

As we concluded our series on “The Life-Giving Power of Community“, the Lord led me to preach on Sunday 02/01/09 about friendships that are “Not Easily Broken“. View the clip below and then post a comment about your friendships and why they are/are not easily broken.

The video is divided into 2 clips because of their size.

Part I – Shatterproof Illustration
Part II – Shatterproof Illustration

Click “Comment” to post a response. I’d love to hear your perspective about friendships/relationships that are/are not easily broken!

Comments (1) Feb 03 2009

Here is a message I sent to a friend. After reading it again, I realized that it may bless you too, so I’m posting it here.

You know, destiny is one of those things we cannot choose, but is rather assigned to us. Most of us spend our entire lives wondering what our destiny is, when in actuality it’s plainly before us. When we follow the Will of God – being righteous, upright, and wholly committed to God – we walk right into our destiny.

Don’t take detours or short cuts. Have the courage to nurture the godly spark in you. Then…your gifts (plural because you have WAY more than what’s been revealed to you) will bless millions!

Comments (0) Jan 28 2009

In our Church Wide Study on 1/4/09 where we began journeying through the book Groups: Life-Giving Power of Community by John Ortberg, et al, we discovered that “the right idea of friendship involves the mutual exchange of knowledge, kindness, service, and celebration.” So often our friendships include a combination of each of these, but is it mutual?

After walking through this lesson I became more sensitive to the “mutual exchange” in a few of my friendships. In one friendship in particular, I noticed that I was giving a lot (knowledge, kindness, service, and celebration) and expecting a lot in return, but made excuses for the other person every time they fell short. I discovered it was a grossly dysfunctional friendship and I contributed to the dysfunction! I contributed to the dysfunction because I never communicated my expectations or needs in the friendship. I have negotiated myself out of the disappointment I frequently feel and subconsciously give the other party permission to continue the behavior. I asked myself recently, “What kind of friendship is this?”

Now don’t get me wrong. I know that friendships involve risk, vulnerability, energy and time. I know that they also involve healthy doses of conflict. I also believe that God delights in life-giving friendships. Those are the friendships in which we are mutually strengthened, nurtured, and corrected! What benefit is our friendship to the Kingdom of God if we don’t challenge one another to grow and mature in it?

You may have asked yourself the question, “What kind of friendship is this?” If it’s not the one that involves the mutual exchange of knowledge, kindness, service, and celebration, it may not be the right idea of friendship. You may be participating in a dysfunctional friendship. Join me in taking responsibility and initiative in our friendships. Speak gently, but speak up!

Comments (1) Jan 06 2009

In the movie Seven Pounds, Will Smith’s character, Ben Greene, says this line…”I have the power to drastically change his life, but I need to know if he’s a good person…” In other words, Ben Greene had the ability to perform a kind deed for someone who desperately needed it, but a prerequisite was the recipient’s worthiness.

Haven’t we all been on the receiving end of a benefactor’s good will? At some point in our lives, each of us has needed the generous or gracious hand of a mentor, sponsor, tutor, admissions committee, or perhaps debt collector. We may have lined up several justifications for our worthiness, including our tremendous efforts, past successes, or perceived need. Yet at the end of the day, we fell several degrees short of perfection and the ideal. There may have been another candidate more qualified or another student more focused. The benefactor may have looked at your curriculum vitae or your transcripts and said, “I have the power to drastically change his life, but I need to know if he’s a worthy candidate.” And at that moment, the words on the page become slaves to grace. It’s grace that gets you the promotion, the internship, the opportunity. It’s grace that stamps “approved” on the application. It’s grace that changes the formula against which you’re measured.

Ben Greene’s statement awakened my appreciation for grace. God through Jesus Christ extended a gift to me (and to you), a gift that had the power to drastically change my life. In this situation, however, my worthiness was not in question. For if it were, there was no doubt or uncertainty. I was definitely NOT worthy. For this gift, a gift more significant than any worldly treasure and more enduring than time, there were no prerequisites. There were no stipulations.

I applaud the Ben Greene’s of the world who are selfless enough to offer the very best of themselves that others may be better off. It does not compare, however, to the gift that God gave this world, his only son Jesus Christ. Let us be ever mindful of the enormous gift that God gave us in and through Jesus Christ. It is the gift that cannot be bought, but it can be passed on.

In this season of giving, what will you give? Join me and thousands of others in the Advent Conspiracy. We are giving more – our time, our energy, our compassion, our faith. Jesus gave without preconditions. Let us strive to do the same.

Comments (3) Dec 21 2008

What do you bring to your friendships, romantic relationships and professional relationships? Ideally, it would be balance. Whether it’s professional, platonic or passionate, relationship balance is essential. Relationships are a cornerstone of human existence. In them we are strengthened, sharpened, and nurtured. Those relationships that contain a rich and vibrant combination of giving and receiving, speaking and listening, and idea creation and contemplation are most rewarding.

This rich and vibrant exchange doesn’t happen by osmosis. It happens when people are prepared and equipped with experience, wisdom, and willingness to invite someone else into a shared experience. In other words, it happens when each one brings something to the table and is willing to share it with the other. We each need not bring the same thing, but we each should bring something.

I’d really like to lift Barack and Michelle Obama as an example of a balanced relationship. Each of them contribute to the vibrance of their family and one another by bringing their own offering to the table. Watching them maneuver presidential transition, parenting, relocation, and marriage with grace and ease is nothing short of amazing. But one need not be a Harvard Law graduate to substantially contribute to, or participate in, a healthy relationship.

A spiritually mature church engages in balanced relationship. This is where each person (clergy, staff, and laity) brings something to the table…and not only the offering table. When persons are willing to bring their spiritual gifts, talents, and time to the faith community, there is balance. Where there is balance there is abundance. Consider Ephesians 6:11-13. We each need not bring the same thing to the table, but each should bring something to the table. (I will pursue this topic again in a separate post about church growth strategies because I believe balanced spiritual relationships builds the Church.)

Given that balanced relationships are “life-giving” how (and why) is it that so many people do not experience balanced relationships? Submit a comment below.

Comments (3) Dec 17 2008